Flowing Against Time ...

untitled

2012-01-15T16:13:00.000+05:30

कुछ अल्फाज़ से दफ़न है
या है ये मजार उन लम्हों की
जहाँ है उनकी खुशबुएँ ज़ब्त
हर दरख्त के साये में

रौशनी जो है छन के आती
पत्तों से लुक छिप कर उन पत्थरों पे
जैसे हो कोई जज्बा लिए
उन्हें आगोश में लेने का

तड़प

2011-12-23T00:54:00.002+05:30

तड़प,
नहीं पता मुझे
बस जी नहीं पाता हूँ

तेरी निगाह के
स्पर्श से
मरहूम

खुशबू
जब न हो ज़हन में वो
सांस ले नहीं पता हूँ

वक़्त
बेवक्त
बस यही
मैं कह नहीं पाता हूँ

आवाज़

2011-11-30T23:41:00.001+05:30

हलक से आवाज़ निकली हि थी
और उन्होंने कहा. अभी आई
झुटपुटे से उजास निकली हि थी
कि एक बदली घिर आई
सीने से सांस निकली हि थी
कि और फिर न आई...

Gray Strand

2011-11-09T21:34:00.004+05:30

and he stared in her eyes beyond that glimmer
to see in heart, caress her in sob
to say she is THE one, for he could take all that
to see that blue poetry with, that forgotten gray strand...

P.S.: It is a continuation/reply to this post

और हम जड़ रह गए

2011-11-07T20:32:00.002+05:30

....और हम रह गए जड़, कि हमने देखा उन्हें

नहीं, नहीं वोह हंसिनी न थीं

नाही थी वोह मयूरी कोई

शायद पलाश कि तलाश में

वल्लाह! उनकी हर एक सिलवट में

किंशुक से इस कदर मिल गए

कि हमने देखा उन्हें, और हम जड़ रह गए ...

the Real Me

2011-10-30T11:11:00.002+05:30

and it ~~happened~~ that way

the way I din't know will happen

some said, it was ~~serendipity~~

other were sure about hallucination

not being sure about its ~~crux~~

I kept staring at nowhere

~~wanted~~ or unwanted

desired or not so

but bound to be there

with~~out~~ being there

smiles, ~~frustration~~, advice, ~~complain~~

all came along, in its lore

still in chaos, I see it

as if I can~~not~~ see it

as I figure it, to be ~~just~~ a change

rocking & reeling all around

time has taken life to new place

its Constant and Unavoidable

well, I knew it will happen

with all & with me alike

am I ~~not~~ loosing myself as they say

or its just me & without any pretension of

~~being the real ME~~

Agony

2011-09-29T01:33:00.001+05:30

till death

~~damned~~ to live

with agony of it

spreading smile

in other livings & ~~deads~~

I walk on...

2011-09-17T02:42:00.001+05:30

I walk on and,
I don't look back

with the breeze,
some times chilled
at others not cool enough

with sunshine
Ouch! scorching at time
Gentle, otherwise

I walk on and,

I don't look back

with moon light
humble to the core
though mysterious in its own right

with night
making moments sensuous
but not always as I thought

I walk on and,
I don't look back

with day
passing by
without noticing happening so

with the time
healer of its own sort
peeler, too of a special kind

with every moment
I walk on and,
Ah! I look back, though I walk on...

It just blows off...

2011-09-04T10:53:00.001+05:30

when i try to cover it

it just blows off..for you

to see it

pain hurled in red threads of eyes

and tears to share the load

heavy heart & countless bloats

slow downed walk

eyes with out spark

vodka, wine whiskys & rum

all ready to scumb spirits

whether play it with charm

modulated voice

with tint of smile

blends of rejoice

when I try to cover it

it just blows off ...for you

to see it

यायावर

2011-09-02T08:04:00.000+05:30

वीरानियाँ

उन तल्ख़ रास्तों की

जिनपे हम चल रहे हैं और थे कभी

डसती ना थी हमें इस क़दर

ना हम तनहा थे और ना रहगुज़र

रोज़ थी ईद और दिवाली हर लम्हे में छुपी

ईख सी थी चखने में, कमबख्त आँखों की वो नमी

तभी दिखा इक पड़ाव एक मोड़ पे

ठंडी बयार सी लगी थी उस छोर पे

इल्म हुआ फ़ना इस उम्मीद के जोर में

मंजिल है यहाँ हमारी लगाने लगा था उस पहर

हुआ सन्निपात तभी हमारी तन्द्रा पे

कहा रास्ते ने हंस कर, चले?

अवाक, मूक बस चल दिए फिर उस डगर

हँसते अपनी समझ और उनकी समझदारी पर

सुन चुके थे उनसे यही चंद अल्फाज़ ए जिगर

थे, हैं और रहेंगे हम ता उम्र यायावर,

Duality & Nature

2011-08-22T21:53:00.000+05:30

Light has its own kind of duality. Universe has it too. May be all other things living/ non living have. It was a matter of amusement and surprize for me when I studied it first time. I wanted to find out how was it exactly. What was it? What it really a phenomenon or just a lack of knowledge and capabilities of we human that we could not find out the reality and just produced the mathematical explanation for whatever we thought was right. Little did that kid know that one duality is yet to come for his dilemma & dismay or both.

As time went by & gained more concious ( stupidity ) and entered into a larger horizon of people all around me through the all medium I was ashtonished to find out the duality of human being, which even defeat light to be honest. No mathematical could solve that for me.

The person who is happy watch porn with friends at home find its rape of culture if Murder or Water has been made and released in India. Mother who is happy when TV charactor is saying some words cant bear if her children doing the same. A Teacher who teaches to children that calling bad word is not right, instantly pick up the phone and answer with abuse.

The way they think for self, for family, for others families, all are different.

I learnt with time that this human spicy has been designed like that.

What do you think?

Ash

2011-07-14T20:01:00.001+05:30

nothing, just ash

of cremation, which hadn't happened yet

coz, some creating ash through effigies

of damsels, posed nude but covered in ash

visible in that pair of eyes,

nothing , just ash

P.S.: Reaction of Flame

Erase

2011-07-09T12:51:00.001+05:30

tuning in & out, had been a habit

to find thee even in random gambit

in unknown faces and not even in just faces

it was a quest followed me in dreams, i erase

P.S: This is a reaction of post Finding Self on Scribblings on the walls

पता नहीं

2011-06-28T03:44:00.000+05:30

पता नहीं

पता नहीं क्यूँ मैं मुस्कुरा कर चल दिया

दिल चाहता था की रोयें

पर खिलखिलाकर हंस दिया

हर टुकड़े की कसक को दबा कर चल दिया

ज़िन्दगी की ताल पे ताल मिला कर चल दिया

उनकी आँखों के सितारों को संजो कर चल दिया

हंसी को उनके लबों का रास्ता दिखा कर चल दिया

रुकना तो बोहुत चाहते थे पर, ये बता बता कर चल दिया

न आपने रोका हमें, कैसे बताये किस कदर दिल कुचल दिया

un-hinged...

2011-06-20T22:08:00.000+05:30

hinged on point some where some how

waiting to be unhinged? not really...

or may be to wrap overall

and it happened...! shattering...it apart

into nowhere...

trance

2011-04-23T21:08:00.000+05:30

thy sipped me to end, my emptiness
quasi static it was in nature if i say
inhaling you in my every breath or beat
i was counting on them to live you all

and i found...
you were larger then both
higher of all, worldly existence
and i could live you all the way

till i was i
and not dispersed in you
to be, not to be
trance was all, what remained to feel...

Life or Death...

2011-03-09T22:10:00.000+05:30

I walk alone along side her
to be there when it hard & rough

din't know if I wanted some thing back from her

still don't know what evaporates my tears

dont know if want to walk out
but it doesn't feel right & painless if I do

insomnia had bitten me , be wrap in her fragerance

it felt so right to be in her essence

don't know if she knew all about the presence

never cared for that, even if it was matter of life of death...

खलिश

2011-02-18T23:58:00.000+05:30

खलिश है इन आँखों में, नमी है गायब

जर्द हैं ज़ज्बात, बन के पत्थर

पत्थर, जिसपे सदियों से है बहता पानी

कोशिश में कुछ ऐसे की बह निकले वोह भी संग संग

पर नैनो को थी किसी की तलाश
या था इंतज़ार, उस एक मुकम्मल अहसास का

जो देंगे उन्हें परवाज़ ए ज़िन्दगी

पहलु में मौत के..

वजूद

2011-01-26T09:40:00.001+05:30

कड़वाहट थी, और रहेगी इस फिजा में

चाही या अनचाही, कही अनकही

बेसाख्ता वक़्त और लोगों से,

अपने वजूद का अहसास कराती हुयी

घुलती हर अंग में, क्षण में

भुलाती हर दूसरे अहसास को हमारे ज़हन से...

P.S.: This post on scribblings on the wall has inspired it

धुंआ

2010-12-21T00:19:00.001+05:30

उन पलों में कुछ घुला था, थी हकीकत या धुंआ था

हम ने ये भी ना पूछा किसी से, मंजर वोह भला किसने बुना था

ठहरी थी जमी , आसमान ठहरा था

हवाएं भी ठिठकी, वक़्त भी अनमना था

ज़र्रा ज़र्रा कुछ इस क़दर फ़ना था, भीगा भीगा सा जैसे समां था

बाहें थी आबाद उनकी रूह समेटे अधरों पे उनके कहकहा सजा था

महफ़िलें आबाद रहेंगी उनसे सारे जहाँ में उनका मजमा था

उन लम्हों को जीते है अब भी हमें तो कुछ कहना भी मना था

Tnnn...

2010-12-17T20:43:00.000+05:30

Picture Courtesy

Tnnn...

was sound which mixed in their smile

galore of twinkles

in eyes

pecks on

glass, changing its hand

claret

dripped in wine

making it

divine

not that some has to die

just a devotion need to ply

Ahh! moments being njoyed

in arms, brash lips & embraced

THE MYSTERY

2010-12-04T23:45:00.002+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 17; the seventeenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

walking

along side by side

staring

no where, but some where

it was flying

like clouds

warmth

of arms conveying

something unsaid
mysterious

but still not mysterious...

Picture Courtesy: SEBI IMAGE

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Woh Kuchh aise the...

2010-11-27T21:46:00.000+05:30

लम्हात

वोह कुछ ऐसे थे

खोये हम

उनमें कैसे थे

इल्लम

ना था गहराई का

आँखों

की तन्हाई का

अहसास

मर रहे थे

दफ़न
हो रहे थे, उनके साथ

ख्वाब
अनकहे, पर नहीं थे अनचाहे....

Celebration

2010-11-08T00:00:00.002+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 16; the sixteenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

55 Fiction#4: Celebration

They din't know what is it.

They couldn't be together, won't be together as well.

Few moments were all they could say their own.

She asked him,"what was it for you"

He replied," Celebration of life"

P. S.: Edited to add title.

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Should they shout "FOUL"? - or walk off saying ..who cares...

2010-10-24T23:54:00.001+05:30

Over the period of time, in the new millenia, they are realizing that it was ( is ) wrong. Since many millenniums they have been under discretion and its intolerable for them anymore.

These are females of our society.

There are many who are raising a voice against these stereotypes and getting a good support and like minded people in both genders. Fair Enough.

IHM says here that Girls are not inviting any one to watch them or scrutinize them by wearing western outfits or any thing for that matter because none of business of people but who ever are wearing them.

Why do they even care about it?

Why does a girl think about it when she can just go her way with out even checking who that guy is?
( Here I am not asking anyone to avoid any sort of molestation.)

Why does a girl think about what society will do, when its evident that society don't have enough guts to stand against a sound lady??

Anyone?

P.S. : Edited to change Title

hum..

2010-10-21T20:01:00.000+05:30

खरामा खरामा चलते रहे हम..
आहिस्ता आहिस्ता बढ़ते रहे हम..
सुनसान सी उन वादियों में..
यूँही हँसते और रोते रहे हम..

कुछ हमारी आँखें ही हम थी..

कुछ थी मौसम में नमी..

बस कुछ कहना ना चाहते थे हम किसी को..

कमबख्त ये दिल था जो रो पड़ा..

Lamha...

2010-10-15T21:24:00.002+05:30

उन लम्हों को संजो रखा है हमने

उन्हीं कुछ पहलुओं को जी रखा है हमने

शायद ज्यादा जीना लिखा ना

होंठो को अपने, सीं रखा है तुमने....

Every Second in Every Hour...

2010-10-02T18:13:00.001+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 15; the fifteenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

I was waiting for her

every second in every hour

in tick tock of watch

in splash of water spilled by

in every passing by passenger

I was waiting for her

every second in every hour

in every page of magazine

in every changed sitting position

in hullabaloos of chandeliers

I was waiting for her

every second in every hour

in chill of ice and warmth of fire

days, months & its been years

in my every smile & tear

Still I am waiting for her

every second in every hour..

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Credits
Image - Alston Station by Wandering Soul
Courtesy - www.deviantart.com via www.blogaton.in

Favor of Furrow...

2010-09-27T20:22:00.001+05:30

Streaming like a River, was her flow

congregating energy had him synergized to bow

Every moment of flow, had been kimono

sheer bliss found igloo in his brow

Haa! it was not a long chronicle

universe had is plan some thing simple

what been assumed as a natural flow

turned out be a favor from indebted ~~furrow...~~

Good Bye

2010-08-07T17:07:00.004+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 13; the thirteenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

spilling drops of brimming fluid,
untouched with all around feud

raw anonymity, berserk rolling oculus
as if opium has taken shape of damsel

neither knew of whats unveiling it self
will it be shining sand or damp thrilling cliff

they had commitment in their core
never said it as if a whore

unison remained a pleasant myriad
Good Bye, had been word to be forbid...

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Edited to Add Description: These are words of a guy who said (first four lines) for his fairer part, who is bound to fall apart (last six lines)

2010-07-26T14:19:00.000+05:30

Some stills from my really not so still life....

what is it? :) any guess

ये शाम मस्तानी...

Keep Smiling...

SAG(E)S.......NOT REALLY...Lolllzzzzzzzz

2010-07-19T13:17:00.004+05:30

SAG(E)S are called for an Pan India (or may be other countries are invited, I don't know, Indian Home Maker to blame for all this) disclosure and declarations. They are saying that all have washed their hand in this BAHATI GANGA , which is flowing up side down according to some very sacred I-don't-know-meter.

For this IHM- Public Revelation Act,2010, about my Sins Against Gender Stereotype, I hereby declare followings:

1. I have a strange fondness for key rings. (I don't know if it qualifies for this)

2. Since childhood I used to do cleaning of home, Laundry, Dishes. (as per my capacity)

3. Know cooking (ahm....ahm...it may be an example of self appraisal)but I am not a good cook for sure.

4. Chocolates. (I dont know how these sweeties fallen in this catagory.IHM....Gaaarrrhh)

5. Have played Teacher Teacher, Table Tennis, Badminton etc. Never thought about any game as girlish or some thing like that many other games are there.

6. A reading freak that when I used run out of reading matter, I would start reading Ladies Magz (some times

I used to read them before my mom :))

7. Believe in word commitment.

8. Don't hate pink or any other color for that matter.

9. I don't encourage Eve teasing(aka sexual harassment)

List goes on...last but not least IHM has thrown a curse to wear pink (for men) and wow I am already wearing that... :)

I would like to hear from HaRy, Shas, Vipul & Vibhuti about their SINs

55 Fiction#4: Perspective

2010-06-14T17:06:00.000+05:30

He was looking in her eyes.
This evening had come after a long time.
He felt a sense of alienation. Warmth, embrace, he used to see for him earlier, was absent now.
He asked hurtfully,"what has been changed?"
She replied, catching him off guard, staring nowhere,"Perspective"

P.S. To know about 55 fiction

timir...

2010-05-14T02:23:00.000+05:30

कुछ अहसास अनकहे से तैर रहे थे हवाओं में
अधरों पे इक मुस्कराहट, जो फैल जाये फिजाओं में
हमने इतना ही चाहा और कुछ यूँ पूछा अदाओं ने
हो तुम अजनबी या कोई छलावा,भर लेते हो बाँहों में
कश लेते हो हमारी साँसों का, जो है बदलती आहों में
हंस कर हमने कहा इतना ही, रंग बदलती निशाओं में
न मेहताब, न ही अली, शायद तिमिर भटकता दिशाओं में

Zazbat....

2010-05-10T11:58:00.003+05:30

शमा जलती रही कुछ इस तरह
तिमिर की बाँहों में मचलती रही कुछ इस तरह
शरारत कभी, कभी उदासी थी नशीली आखो में
प्यार कभी तकरार थी उनकी बाँहों में
नहीं था तो बस एक अहसास
अहसास उनके, होने का
उनकी आँखों से
पूछा तिमिर ने कसकसात से
वो कहे उठे कुछ इस क़दर
फलसफा हो तुम, रूहानी बातों के
कैसे फना हो जाये सिर्फ तुम्हारे ज़ज्बातों में...

Picture Courtesy: Insignia

Pleasure....

2010-05-06T13:09:00.002+05:30

Dancing flame of her will
kept struggling with dark devil
li'l did she know...
it was darkness of her absence
all around her
calling for her to disperse
and Njoy the immense pleasure
pleasure for she craved,
from bottom of the heart
why is she not deciphering her favor?

Picture Courtesy: Insignia

55 Fiction#3: I don't know

2010-05-05T10:16:00.000+05:30

He loved to see smiles on those pair of lips & eyes

Always Intact.Time flew by when they were together.

He asked her to be put up with him forever.

She left him in a fix saying,"I don't know"

P.S.: To know more about 55 fiction please refer here

crack...

2010-05-04T13:26:00.003+05:30

crack..
it was visible by now...but only to few
who knew to read eyes..
not smile playing on lips..
irrespective of crack...

rolling tear, sinking heart, flickering eyes
being hugged, to loose all the grieves
take or mistake, doesn't matter any more
lets get submerged in the each other's core....

Embrace...

2010-05-03T14:41:00.003+05:30

uneven pieces of shattered self
had all edges to mend any one, be it elf
still...some one cared, as if catered
them to be smashed further
to reconstruct
to make her smile
to fly again high
to .........

dint even realize what had happened
while embracing......inner self ~~smoldering..~~
edges of pieces ~~nailing~~ every where
still Njoying the bloody ordeal in every sphere

Picture Courtesy: Deviantart

55 Fiction#2:thanks

2010-04-22T10:54:00.003+05:30

Days and nights went by in wait.

He knew she will be back.

Even she has been surprised for this ridiculous confidence.

Suddenly he had been smashed on the road.

He looked on to driver of the truck in few moments and said,"Thanks"

with his eyes...

P.S.: to know more about 55 Fiction please refer here

kya yahi zindagi hai ...

2010-04-21T14:48:00.001+05:30

वक़्त बेवक्त, ज़ज्बात ज़ज्ब कर जाना

अश्कों को कही कोने में छुपाना

अधरों को मुस्कराहट में खिलाना

क्या यही ज़िन्दगी है...

काली निशा के साये में अनायास ही डर जाना

और तड़पना किसी एक अपने हमसाये के लिए

ख्वाबो में, छुप जाना उसके आगोश में..

क्या यही ज़िन्दगी है ...

सुबह के बाद दोपहर और फिर शाम हो जाना

रातों को बस शून्य में तकते जाना

बिना काटों की घडी के बस चलते जाना

क्या यही ज़िन्दगी है..

Image Courtesy: Deviantart

Yes, We are Handicapped - Indian Women

2010-04-14T18:07:00.001+05:30

"Yes, We are Handicapped."

Does it sounds nice to you, being handicapped?? I hope it doesn't. (anyone willing to answer this??)

Ever since reservation made its debut in Indian System. It is gaining its size, adding to varieties and in turn more and more are falling pray for its side effects.

Anyway I have few questions for Indian Women here:

Do you really need reservation in Indian Parliament &Assemblies?

In the current socio-political scenario, reservation has become a tool for gaining political mileage rather making things better for any one. Reservation on any basis has not been proven a effective way to tackle any sort of lacking in societies. People those were Able already have become more powerful and needy still at the same place.

Despite of reservation, other options like providing financial backing (in terms of scholarships etc.), spreading awareness (already Govts running several programs), proper execution of schemes have done miracles

Will reservation proved to be effective?

Even if women get reservation in Parliament what is the guarantee that the new ladies coming to house wont become puppets of their male patrons?

As a political leader from Bihar said,"Do you think, If I ask my wife to vote in a particular way then she would do otherwise."

What can be more effective then reservation?

IF a self confident woman find her way at her own every where in power corridor or may be every where else too would it not be more pleasing?

*************

If rather then reserving Parliament, govt can reserve the right to live fearlessly for all in Indian?

If they can ensure logging of FIR and then a fair trial for every crime happened against women?

If they can ensure minimum possible infant mortality rate?

If they can ensure 100% literacy rate?(though it is evident it doesn't eradicate crime against women, at least a better level of awareness will be achieved)

Would not it be more effective then reservation?

because reservation doesn't ensure all these.

Dilapidation....

2010-04-09T15:31:00.000+05:30

Running though her eyes, they appeared

yearning to fall and get ~~smeared~~

to find some hugging arms

or soothing heavy, husky voice to calm

earlier it was all dreamland

he was all, mentor, guide & friend

she used to run to & fro, to be a catch of him

to be a toy, in his playing palms

brutal ~~dilapidation~~ of the world,

she witnessed with heavy heart

but before that she got confused

flying fist& flaring eyes; for her, all dart

why did voices reached high pitch

and harshness became the breakfast& lunch

Ohh! its raining, through eyes

Dad!! why couldn't you made it

I missed you, very much

and will be missing You but with ~~pain...~~

Kami...

2010-04-06T09:38:00.002+05:30

हवाओं में कुछ नमी सी थीं

शायद वोह कुछ थमीं सी थीं

वल्लाह ! उन्हें कुछ था पता

कमबख्त हमीं में कुछ कमी सी थी...

Picture Courtesy: DeviantART

ever mined?

2010-03-30T00:00:00.014+05:30

Some thing still....still flowing,

Seeping through the unseen passage,
the moment it seems resolving,
afresh, new, breeze &stream grip me,if pouring

timed to be untimed

will it be ever mined?

Image Courtesy: DeviantArt

Not more...

2010-03-24T00:00:00.001+05:30

Some where in the lap of nature

Some time, when even light were darker
Some how, it happened out of power
Some one, came more then closure
but then just remain some one and not more..

Pic courtesy: for the pic related to this post please see this Tikulicious

Akshunnn...

2010-03-15T00:00:00.008+05:30

सरकता रहा वो कभी पानी

कभी रेत की तरह ...

दरख्ख्त भी ना रह सके अपनी जड़ों पे

खंडहर हो चली थी इमारतें ...

इंसान भी चूर हुए , उनके अहम् भी

टूटे कसमें, वादे और टूटे वहम भी

ना रही सभ्यताएं , अवशेस अवश्य बचे

ना रहा कुछ पूर्ण, ना रहा कुछ अक्ष्क्षुन्न...

English Script:

sarkata raha woh kabhi pani

kabhi rait ki tarah ...

darkkhat bhi na rah sake apni jadon pe

khandahar ho chali thi imaratein...

insaan bhi choor huye, unke aham bhi

tute kasamein, vadein aur tute waham bhi

na rahi sabhyatayein, avshesh avshya bache

na raha kuchh poorn,na raha kuchh akshkshunn....

Image Courtesy: Deviantart

unsaid....

2010-03-11T00:00:00.008+05:30

tip... tip....

not water, not tears, its red, its thick,

its blood........

dripping from wounds,unseen

continuous, being unclouted, unheard

nothing happen to it, its unhurt

every thing was quite, unsaid

it waited to get healed, untouched

smile on lips, in which every one take dips

breath is deep, heavy but undisturbed

will she be able to see, unwritten, unsaid..

Time Travel

2010-03-06T00:00:00.004+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 8; the eighth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

around 10,000 years ago

A man asked his wife to get passed in fire test, to test her holiness.

around 2000 years ago

They used to be a commodity.
(still continues in one form or other)

around 1500 years ago
They used to get burnt alive with dead bodies of their husbands.

800 years ago

Ministers didn't boar with a lady emperor. She had been assassinated.
No Female allowed in Power Corridors.

500 years ago

No right in properties of either father or husband.
(ONLY a share of husband property had been allowed that also in very few cases.It is partially in effect till date)

250 years ago
They had been kept in cover. No interaction with non-family-member man.
(still existing in some societies)

100 years ago

Female Genital Mutilation was a traditional practice.
(Still existing in some societies)

50 years ago
Almost 85% types of jobs were in hands of Males.(in India)
Female were not supposed to work.
(still continue in many societies)

15 years ago

Woman reservation bill, has been introduced in Parliament of India but
NOT APPROVED TILL DATE.

today

Rape, Female Infanticides are common.
Their lives are governed by others.
Representation in governments is very low.
Women got reservation in Panchayati Raj System(India) in 2009, but original power holders are still their male patrons.

It seems time is not traveling at all for some one called Woman

(or hardly traveled)

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Let the magic begin...

2010-03-03T10:21:00.004+05:30

Yeah, you are hearing right. My friends are so generous with me. I know, its mind boggling and surprising at the same time *huge grin* but Shruti found me LOYAL (to whom she only can tell you. lollzzz) .I swear , I have not pampered her for doing this ..sachchi muchhi. *innocence dripping from the face*

I am passing this award (or term what ever s/he feel like) to HaRy &Insignia

*****

Another blame on me is of being AWESOME BLOG BUDDY, BLOGGER BUDDY AWARD &BEST BLOGGING BUDDY by Shruti and Pakhuri respectively. They has convicted me for which God forbidden crime I don't know but showing my full gratitude and confidence in Constitution of god knows where, I am accepting the terms.

This Award goes to Shas (please don't look at me like this, please, please, please)

*****

Extending her generosity Pankhuri , see me as:

I hope, I will not pay back her debt ever back but still I like to present the same award to

Indian Home Maker , Psych Babbler , Shruti &Meow hope they will curse me for the same. :)

*****

and its does not get a full stop there only (don't worry I wont bore you much now please bear with me, thoda sa aur...pulleeeeezzzzzzzz), and the blog is recognized as:

Rachana &Titaxy deserve this award very much for their blogs and writings.

P.S.: Who ever has already started cursing me can send mail also, full of their lovely words.

P.P.S.: If you have been to this post by title it self, You have killed ,not me ......your time. :)

quenching flames....

2010-02-25T12:34:00.000+05:30

drops of coolant, fallen on burning dzire

to see, just a mere glance of her magical eyes

and they evaporated in fumes,

declaring need of a mayhem or snow fall?

caressing with care & looking those pair

of beauty &depth, as love was in the air

taste &touch, drenched every moment

days became hours and hours, seconds...

smile, that made all fallen in straight

was decorating her eyes, lips &face

neither wanted to part again

all they were doing was to refrain

from even thought, of going apart

but unknowing of every thing coming a dart

that morning sun wasn't as bright

air wasn't as crispy &light

still they enjoyed the feeling or them

or being one, being integral, in the quenching flames

55 Fiction#1:alive..

2010-02-22T12:15:00.004+05:30

55 Fiction is a form of micro-fiction that refers

to the works of fiction limited to a maximum of

fifty-five words.

It is my first attempt for 55 fiction. I hope from all the reader to bear with & provide their valuable suggestion

they chuckled together.
enduring emotions made it impossible for him to refrain from ensuring more time with her.
He asked her,'" why don't you get enrolled in my college"
she replied,"I would have indeed, if I have been Alive" still smiling.
It is hard to say what was he? dumb stuck or horrified?

Ankahi...

2010-02-15T10:44:00.005+05:30

kuchh tha shayad,

mukammal nahi

bas tha kuchh

ankaha, unchhua,

deh jarjar ho chali thi usaki,

roondi ja chuki thi

anginat bar, anjaano se

jo janate the

woh janane layak na the

khilkhilahat

usaki chahu aur vyapt hai

naino mien chamak

deh ~~vishakt~~ hai

usaki thokar mien hai

zindagi

phir bhi na jane kyun

udaas hai

par

koi chhoo na paya

usaki rooh ko

paak..

nirmal...

pyaasi ...

aadhoori......

kab hogi usaki peeda, damit

kab hogi woh

poori

Picture Courtesy: Gautam & Insignia

Squirrel

2010-02-03T10:17:00.000+05:30

As I entered the gate of my home a familiar sensation went through the curtain. He smiled to see her & hugged her to feel the breath of her. was it love? even he didn't know that.

What did he know is:

When he glances on her...he smiles
Its great to see if she is happy.
having a meal with her, makes his day awesome.
time fly by with her.
if she is quite, life gets a pause

Who is she?

Squirrel

yeah! you heard right. She is a Squirrel.

Biology...

2010-02-02T13:30:00.002+05:30

Em-blazing eyes were falling on cool water fall, which was feeling guilty for not quenching this pair with its cooling effect.

Furious.Yes, it was right word for her state. She was furious on herself. How could she do that? Wasn't she challenging her own existence all together.

whole night passed by and then while mechanically performing her daily course of living hood she walked towards back home. It was quiet evening as usual but inside her she could not specify if it was volcano or hurricane, though outcomes are not too different. Death.

She, her mom told her, she wasn't her mom(!!??)

She was an orphan biologically.

Blankness..

2010-02-01T09:28:00.000+05:30

Its there

in every spoken or unspoken word

in yesterday, today or even future...

every wrinkle of her weary skin

heart, arteries, or in the jugular vein

creeping age, moment by moment

peeping chasm, from the corners of eyes

it wasn't weaved in destiny

have not you found ~~blankness~~ killer?

Reverberance....

2010-01-21T15:23:00.000+05:30

silence of scattering ~~pieces~~ echoed
as eyes glanced to stills of LORD

reverberance was so overwhelming
off guard was the human so caring

caught in fury of happenings
couldn't composed self in musical saplings

time has made a human, so ~~inhuman~~
remorse, pain, tears all given way to passion

sprinkling smile or flamboyant style
always try to put together ~~broken pieces of plight.~~

Nigahein...

2010-01-15T14:12:00.001+05:30

katil E nigahien kafi thi hamare katl e aam k liye ...
kambkht woh muskura diye humien dekh kar..

Ummeedein....

2010-01-14T17:06:00.002+05:30

rang rooth chale the shayad
un besakhta lamhaat mien

benoor ho chale the darkht bhi
sar jhukaye waqt ke kadamo mien

bhujane lagi thi umeedein ~~kafan~~ ke saaye tale

ki muskurahat ne chooma use dheere se........

Image courtesy :http://www.deviantart.com/ & Meow

Mehak...

2010-01-12T11:49:00.000+05:30

zindagi kuchh is qadar ajeeb huyi
nazar e inayat bhi na unki naseeb huyi

unhe ~~uzr~~ tha hamari shakshiyate e maujudagi se
andheron se humari dosti mazboot huyi

deewanagi hamari humien na chhod saki magar
maut se hamne kaha thaharo jara, mehak unki naseeb huyi...

and...

2010-01-11T14:41:00.002+05:30

And she ~~couldn't~~ do this much...

to take care of her self
to keep smiling & to njoy her elf

~~fugitive, fragile, fiasco ridden~~
her body & soul has become

just one promise was asked to keep
to take care & to smile at deep.

intzaar...

2010-01-07T12:41:00.000+05:30

Lamhe is qadar fanaaa huye
un lamho ke ik adad deedar mien
kambhqt ~~dard~~ utar aaya aankhon ki ek mazaar mien
Ashq se roobroo ho chale hai woh chand rato mein E waqt
ek aawaz aayi,"shukr hai kuchh sadiyan hi mukhtlif hai is intzaar mein..."

P.S.: By the way its my 25th post here. Silver Jublie. :).

Et al...

2010-01-04T17:04:00.000+05:30

~~blankness~~,
defined it self in those eyes

colors
seems be some thing alien

no pain, no joy, no emotional harl
how the almighty has been missed et al

and then eyes smiled,
to miss it again, for the attempt to make them ~~smile et al~~.

Yakbyak...

2009-12-30T13:15:00.000+05:30

Mayyaser tha jinhe khula aasama
pankh pasare undane ke liye

pinge bhara karate the
khwabo ko sath liye

yakbyak kufr tut pada jaise
kisi ne kaha "waqt ki dastaq hai..."

Image Courtesy: http://deviantart.com

HEAVenly Semblance...

2009-12-29T11:42:00.000+05:30

Landing
In the land of possibilities couldn't be funnier

but wait was getting too stiffer
No One couldn't define the source of energy

to run untiringly, unstoppably, unblinkingly
so what if there were barriers, even they had fallen in love with him

No One was bound to make it gr88888888
to every person: human, inhuman or ~~his mate~~

at last, they realized....... the fragrance,,,,,the touch....the feel...

too immersed to think anything else
dawning in each others caress & heavenly semblance

~~why did moments pass by?~~
~~his limitation again he realized~~

he begged to time, please
let me see her, touch her with pouring blissssssssssss

dont want to free her with my armss
Cant you give me li'l more chance??

echoing silence

2009-12-15T15:46:00.001+05:30

ardent but ~~eldritch~~, or was it simply virtual...
when breath were li'l heavy or chilled & amp perpetual...

time had been chiseling more often then not...
waiting for fall of eyes on bleeding coral...

Aha..!! smile is twinkling with sheer brightness
bleeds are getting cured or its been smoldered

whatever, all mortal or immortal are cheering..
on the faintest sight of whirling coiffure....

congregating satanic instincts being defied
the chronicle in making will say all over high

echoing silence in thunder storm..
proving at last archfiend is happy & strong...

Elf

2009-12-08T12:31:00.001+05:30

~~screams, cries, remorse~~
nothing is flowing out of her...

its tough...
to smile, because its best to ~~stick~~ with
to laugh, because its great to ~~hide~~ with

still she keep it up, to keep her self high
her ~~incongruity~~ will swallow her down

in no time, its all ~~pulpy pale~~
In no time, its all being in rail

cant be her SELF, still be hersELF
its not her dilemma but her FairyTale

sTILL aLIVE...

2009-11-30T16:20:00.000+05:30

Smiling face, sprinkling voice
all this made all ~~blind~~ and rejoice

yeaaahh! it ~~pierced~~ deep there
knowingly or unknowingly who care

heart was ~~blaming~~ for not being drained
nerves were behaving as ~~fish~~ in frying pan

body retaliated to change its language
lips ~~struggled~~ to keep smiling during this voyAGE

whole Universe smiling & wondering for happenings
why don't he ~~break down~~ in and under the carriage

As the ~~sorely~~ smiling Eyes, began to speak
~~dead~~ peace too was keen to listen without a creak

one word that answered all dead N ~~live~~
O Great Cosmos! Love is what make me aL!VE...

wonder

2009-11-23T17:20:00.000+05:30

Swirling sensation clinging with her
guarded mind, struggling harder

Dizziness gripping mind
stiffness prevailing in spine

she is wondering on his effect
how can he make her like this

by just touching her heart
~~not her bossom or flesh..~~

New Life...

2009-10-28T18:01:00.000+05:30

Enchanting word reeling around her
perforating feel kneeling to decipher
mist is now cleared, but uncleared
sprout is lying under her layer...

I dont know what to say ...

2009-10-12T13:19:00.001+05:30

Tagged...:)....Lets vrooooooooooooooomm....

RULES: Respond and rework – answer these questions on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your own, and add one more question to the list. Then tag eight or ten other new set of people.

1.What is your current obsession? Myself

2. What are you wearing today? Uniform

3. What’s for dinner? hummm,,,i guess some sort of Pulao.

4. What’s the last thing you bought?5 New T-shirts..

5. What are you listening to right now?No voice ....silence..

6. What do you think about the person who tagged you?humm...tough question...I dont know her much,,,but i feel Rohini is nice human being.

7. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished anywhere in the world, where would you like it to be? hummm...tough question....the home where i have spent my 5 years. (2nd - 7th years)

8. What are your must-have pieces for summer? Handkerchiefs in loads, water from earthen pot.

9. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go? Siachin Glaciar

10. Which language do you want to learn? All.

11. What’s your favorite quote? Every thing happens for good.

12. Who do you want to meet right now? My Friend.

13. What is your favorite colour? Blank & Blue

14. What is your favourite piece of clothing in your own closet? Jeans & Shirt

15.Define your self in a word?Mrigank (its replaced question by me)

16. What’s your favorite magazine? India Today.

17. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on? ipod Nano :)

18. What do you consider a fashion faux pas? Every next outfit i see them wearing on ramp.lolzzzz(it may make you think ...I am a fash faux lolzzz)

19. Who according to you is the most over-rated style icon? More or less All. (Media doesn't has any sense promoting any one like god....ufffffffff)

20. What kind of haircut do you prefer? Fauzi Cut with lil modification of course.

21. What are you going to do after this? I dont know actually lolzzz

22. Who is your favorite sport star? Roger Federer

23. What are three cosmetic/makeup/perfume products that you can't live without? Nothing as such.

24. What inspires you? Distinctiveness. It may be in any thing.

25. Give us three styling tips that always work for you. well.may be black n blue...lolzz (one is enough from me..actually more will be fash devastator :))

26. What do you do when you “have nothing to wear” (even though your closet’s packed)? I never happens

27. Coffee or tea? Coffee.Ultra Dark.

28. What do you do when you are feeling low or terribly depressed?It doesn't happen to me any more

29. What is the meaning of your name? Moon

30. Which other blogs do you love visiting? All those that I follow.

31. Favorite Dessert/Sweet? Kheer. Ice cream.

32. Favorite Season?I like all but Winter are wowwwwww

33. If I come to your house now, what would u cook for me? Pulao.

34. What is the right way to avoid people who purposefully hurt you? Just Avoid. (by the way there must be some reason you can work out on that??)

35. What do you love most about yourself? My way of thinking. Every thing all in all.

36. What is it that you think most about?People & Their Problems ( After all I am a counselor).

Should i add a question?

37. why do you get angry? I dont get angry but one situation is exception, some one is making my mumma feel bad Knowingly.

Ohh I got lil emotional ...with my last question...well once in a blue moon its allowed :)

Grinning....Shilpa...hARy...Shas....Shruti ..c'mon....take it up.:)

Dumb....it may leave you Numb ....

2009-10-08T13:27:00.000+05:30

Shas, I am honored, you tagged me, especially for this one. I not only hope but also have my full faith that i wont disappoint you and whole DUMBO Community & will prove m self a STAR. So avoiding much ado let start the do...

(I am getting nervous...ohhh )..

The more [x]’s the “dumber” you are.

[ ] Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking

[ ] Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking
[x] You have ran into a glass/screen door
[x ] You have jumped out of a moving vehicle
[x] You have thought of something funny while walking by yourself
[x] Laughed, then watched people give you weird looks

after first over score : 4/6 ... i guess i will hit new records ...let move ahead..

[x] You have run into a tree/bush.

[ ] You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow
[x] You have tried to lick your elbow… a few times
[ ] You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little star have the same rhythm.
[ ] You just tried to sing them.

ooops it kinda okay okay over 6/11... let us see in next over ...

[ ] You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
[ ] You have choked on your own spit .
[ ] You have seen the Matrix and still don’t get it.
[ ] You’ve never seen the Matrix.
[ ] You type only with two fingers.

OH MY GOD....whats happening.....i cant be so smart 6/16..lolzzzz

[x] You have accidentally caught something on fire
[ ] You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes.
[x ] You have caught yourself drooling.
[ ] You have fallen asleep in class and fell outta your chair
[x] You stared hard at someone trying to figure whether the person was he or she

9/21...thnks god.....i am improving now....huff..huff...

[ ] Sometimes you just stop thinking
[x] You are telling a story and forget what you were talking about
[ ] People often shake their heads and walk away from you
[ ] You are often told to use your “inside voice”.
[x] You use your fingers to do simple math

So far: Hopefully i will get clear..... 11/26

[ ] You have eaten a bug
[ ] You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important
[x] You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it
[x] You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand
[x] You have ran around naked in your house.

So far: 14/31 At least better then Indian cricket team ..lolzzzzzzzz..

[ ] You repost bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t.
[x] You break a lot of things.
[ ] Your friends know not to use big words around you.
[ ] You tilt your head when you’re confused
[ ] You have fallen out of your chair before
[ ] Mistook your teacher to be a student

So far: 15/37

[x] When you’re lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling or wall
[x] The word “ummmmm” is used many times a day.
[ ] Have you opened your mouth to say something but then you pretended as if you were yawning because you forgot what you wanted to say.

Total Score: 17/40 (looking around with twinkling eyes)...scratching head...i cant believe it...

(17/40)*100= 42.5% (sigh of relief....passed it)

All Community and Shas, I admit that i have not been proven myself upto tat level i have promised but for that I guess i need to join some rehabilitation center (Shas your score os poorer so please help me if you have found one.)

I hope Shilpa, Shruti and Hary would not disappoint me as well.

Gud Luck guys.

Drizzling of Claret

2009-10-07T11:04:00.001+05:30

pinching palpation of drizzling of claret

halcyon regale making them feel enable

insomnia has bugged them, or it got infected

or we got baptized, to holy religion

coiffure are drenched in his gore..

cervix annexing sweltered smooch

claw brushed with her viscera

lunar effulgence shining over them

affexxxions tor her, made cessation

they are getting faded, or getting merged

texture is being seen as mutilating deed

r' they njoying, indiscreet unraveling seed...

International Blogger.....Ahm Ahm!!!

2009-09-22T13:24:00.002+05:30

Acceptance Speech:

Well, Ladies (bloggeries) & Gentleman(bloggeras) ...if any and I am pretty amused as well as confused (as usually ..lolzz). what made me International Blogger? I guess Shilpa can reply to this who presented this award to me and i am no one to question her generosity and kindness (slapping self :)). I am so happy that my eyes are getting wet with happiness and I am not able to handle emotions in me. Let me take a short but not commercial, break.....

Okay!! now showing utmost respect to both Shilpa and the International Bloggers Community, let me be li'l disciplined (despite of my all indiscipline during my graduation, university awarded 98% mark for discipline ) and tell you about the rules:

Link the person who tagged you.

Copy the image above, the rules and the questionnaire in this post.
Post this in one or all of your blogs.
Answer the four questions following these Rules.
Recruit at least seven (7) friends on your Blog Roll by sharing this with them.
Come back to BLoGGiSTa iNFo CoRNeR (PLEASE DO NOT CHANGE THIS LINK) at http://bloggistame.blogspot.com and leave the URL of your Post in order for you/your Blog to be added to the Master List.

Questions & Your Answers:

(i) The person who tagged you: Shilpa

(ii) His/her site's title and url: A rose Is A Rose Is A Rose

(iii) Date when you were tagged: 17 September 2009

(iv) Persons you tagged are:

Shas :- In short time span she has sharpen her writing skills that much that now i am afraid of getting killed. ;)

Nishita:- Nice blog (let me see about blogger ;)), I have been there and felt Nice. :)

Chandreyee :- So greatly expressed blog. :)

Mou:- Her diaries are fantastic and will make you imagine the world of her.:)

Megha:- Potential writer. (of course if she explores herself!!):)

Pooja:- Indeed a good emotional expresser, good poetess. :)

Shobha:- Welcome to world of Cooking, visit and get your mouth watering!! :)

P.S. : Keep Smiling

NOWHERE

2009-08-17T17:48:00.001+05:30

Finally She, a teacher, was organizing Grih Pravesh Ceremony but her heart was not sounding that happy, Pearl, younger daughter had wrapped up herself for her college in other city. Alrek, elder son, already keep fluctuating between home and Delhi(his workplace). In 48th spring of her life, finally she has got a nest to which she can say her.Still she is weaving dreams to live with Paarth, her husband, though for them its too big now.

Suddenly a voice, loud and clear stalls her thought trains, "Postman". Few moments, Paarth is coming back with a envelop written "URGENT"in red ink as if they want to engrave it. No one paid attention, these days only policy premiums and other govt papers are supposed to be delivery materials by Post Man.

But there was some thing more then that & it was making Paarth smile.His eye were sparkling and that made her smile too with surprize. Paarth announced in a flamboyant voice, he has to move to other city as he has won his legal suit with state govt for his job, which was pending for last 22 years.

She got confused how to react.

She felt stuck staring NOWHERE.

I AM the GROUND ZERO

2009-08-06T10:06:00.001+05:30

I am THE GROUND ZERO
I am THE NO ONE

here you came when you felt ~~finished~~
i am glad that my voice works as tears of phoenix

arms are open to welcome you & your every done
doesn't matter to me, later on how much you SHUN

your cry...made me loose ~~tushunnn~~
i wanted to see you blossoming by any reason

I were happy when ever you smiled
doesn't matter if it required ~~my autumn~~

your few take offs had cost me dearly
~~blown off~~ few my nerves & peaceful mansions

but trust me, no change in the NO ONE
~~its~~ still want you to cheer, with all zeal & spun

whenever you feel ~~finished, shattered & broken~~
kiss me and feel my love and afexxxxxion

NO ONE will be always clearing your blurred vision...
GROUND ZERO will always welcome you, to hug your ~~every problem~~

you will feel cured enough, to make the world stun
NO ONE always luv you to see you in fun

I AM the GROUND ZERO
I AM the NO ONE

so i am sufferring, of being apart from you, in heaven ..........

2009-07-23T15:47:00.002+05:30

a fragrant eve or beautiful night ......
i wasnt having any idea be it very slight...

you were there in my mind...
i let you unfold my most of bind...

you were my world... in & out....
i always curled every ahhh in my mouth...

i never let you know that i can feel mine own pain too...
i even dont want now to some thing goes to you ....

there is a smile on your face i loved to see...
never minded if it required me to be bloodyyy...

when you wanted me.....i was there ...
but never expected when i needed you to be near ...

....i hated this word....EXPECTATION
because its has its disgusting creations

but i did not know if i thought you were mine..
its not right ....if i thought we will have gud time ..

I am so sorrry i hurted you ...
SIN i have done...still i luv you....

and i wont forgive maself ...why have i EXPECTED a smile on ur lips..
when i called you as it was earlier used to be, had given you kicks...

tonyt ..my heart ..is crying......
to say ....it is you ..i m lovng

whts wrong ...i have done ....
so i am sufferring, of being apart from you, in heaven ..........

Morning RAGA.....

2009-07-16T18:13:00.001+05:30

4am,too early to get up him, but cell beeped and as he picked up, a frightening voice announced,' Result has been announced." His mind, floating some where in his la la land, gained conscious for yelling'"what, Fuck, Oh Ma God." Call disconnected. He too, with real world to get in from where he came.

Next morning, 8am, collecting himself some how (though its nearly impossible for him as usually). Yelling on pals,"have you checked yours"

prompt reply," you fuckin' ass, we are all along with ya, we are going together to college how can we?"

he smiled," oh we will get screwed up together"

This peck of unarranged, uncollected, out of wits guys(really?) approaching to their college. In some time they land up in their work stations.

All around atmosphere is mixed, tears or happiness, frustrated laughs, caring hugs, left alone guys and gals. Thanking or cursing god.

He afraid but not afraid, confident but not confident, composed but out of mind, key down his name and hit ENTER.

Marksheet is on screen, he is totally confused, is it mine? pals are silent. He smiled. His body not in his controlled.

Mean while a prof asked," whats up boy?"

Reply,"Nothing sir, lemme talk to you later on please"

His mind has shot in blank. On return journey, thinking of ways of committing suicide due to failure in seven out off eight subjects.Killing self with knife would be to paining, dropped. After many more ideas, when he reached his room, he had decided to go around and collecting sleeping pills because no chemist would be agree to give him many in lot (Being aware of result had been out in all town).

But he is now too tired to do any but sleep. ZzZzZzZzZ.......

6pm. He wakes up, get out of his bed, take a face wash & wondering how can he sleep in day time (he is not habitual with this). Anyway strgguling in his mind when he approaches nearest food joint and guys around are talking about result, still he is not able to recall his MORNING RAGA, then a pal remind him, Our class has doomed more or less.

He is smiling (on himself??)again, thinking of MORNING RAGA and then breaks in laughter hysterically yelling ..uffff I forgot to commit suicide......

I luv her .as if i am a vamp

2009-07-08T11:12:00.001+05:30

i was dying every single moment

pealing of my skin wasn't visible to her ..

i was embracing the deepest dark

tear scoops had fiercest drought

but....

for my surprize i was content

that she has become a new debutant

to explore her life for new spans

Njoying her life's every moment

though...

i was missing her , if running out of breath

puss was spilling ,skin beneath

heart was struggling for every moment of life

nerves were getting deeps & crests

stil...

i hadnt wished to let it be float

her smile was what made me afloat

her voice was what worked as my breath

I luv her ..as i am a vamp

who is in luv with blood & death

I want to Cry ...

2009-07-01T10:21:00.001+05:30

na jane kyun hai ye ashq in aankho mei..

na jane kyun rona chahta hai ye dil ...

shikwa nahi hai kisi se ise ....

na hi koi shkayat hai....

bas tanhayi mein bilkhna chahta hai....

chahta hai ki kaynat doob jaye usake aansou mein,,,

bas darta hai ki koi apana na doob jaye ..

phir aawaz aati hai kahi door ander se ...

poochhti hai ise jhakjhor ke....

tujhe koi paraya bi lagata hai.??

jawab nahi hai isake pass....koi..

bas ...ek hi bat kahta hai ....

ro bhi nahi pata hu mein ....

koi rula de mujhe ..

mujhe rona hai ...

what ever you do , thats it...

2009-06-18T13:15:00.001+05:30

I am with you
its said by you

earlier i felt it
njoyed and gulped it

I hugged you
with out thinking of any due

whenever you felt for it
what ever else i never cared that's it

you were my bottom line
i was your reason to shine

times has gone
you don't need me now on

its not my call which which makes you smile
though i dont regret loving you at every mile

but it takes time
to accept you are not mine

its not my voice
what makes your world poise

I am sorry
i love with out any query

I didn't cared what you are
Even it wasn't matter who you are

how do you look
thats not in my book

Its not time which
can down love in my pitch

Every draft of my pore
love you by its core

because core of heart
wont be tired of hurt

you cant stop it..
what ever you do , thats it...

What was it ....

2009-06-13T18:50:00.001+05:30

He was getting late ....for tuition ..at 11am..maths ...but he was confident he will make it in time. He was good cyclist after all....it was a result of cycling of many year .after all...............he picked his cycle and paddled it towards adarsh nagar ..for maths tuition....some thoughts were fueling him ..inside .........Class 11.......Section Science Maths....School was Biggest school of that small town ....having strength more then 4000+ student...they called is semi college ....because they were there till they were willing to be there ...but he was a sincere student so he has not bunked semi college that frequently ....though he enjoyed leg pulling of lecturers in his classes ..and teachers some times feared of going in class ...some times not always ...after all teachers were teachers.

He made in time to tuition ...and his teacher with thick glass ...having bowled eyes behind them those were ready to get of the cup meant for them in face of that man.....and he always made it issue of fun .....always ...not only him but whole school ...4000+ students ....after tuition he went to school but ...mind was stuck in ...clock ...he didn't know what was in bag of future .....all the lectures he tried ...to escape from teachers those were wondering ...what happened to this guy ...he is not in class ...they knew by their experience after ..they had seen a life time ....but they were not interrupting him much because it might have made him rebel ....they were already know his instinct ....so its better to leave alone for a day.
Time was too slow to pass that day ........even he didn't know ..what was happening ....though he waited ...his friend were too ...trying to involve him but not getting him ..in .....they did not know what was there ..going in his mind ....he never told any one about this ..........he never had any secret unfolded before anyone ....he did not want to be dependent on any one for his sake ....not at all...he was Emperor of his on Empire and did not want to loose his sovereignty....well...so no one knew why he follow buses ..Actual reason ....he was early waiting for 5.30pm.
As he has done nearly daily....basis ,,,,when he came to know that some one goes by that WHITE SCHOOL BUS of nearby the biggest gals school of the same town.....and ....then onwards every day he followed that bus ..without making it point that may be she was in bus ..may be she was on leave ....but he followed that bus ..and made it a point to defeat that bus with his bicycle and succeed many time due to traffic which helped him but that day was different i guess.

5.30 Bell rung ..and so ..guitar in his heart ......he ran up towards parking ... for cycle and so his friend because all knew ..they are going chase that bus...why all has different reason ...given by him ....fabricated rather ...and they all were ready ....but 3 out of 5 were not in enthusiasm to do so .....and opt out for race ....he declared his mandate...he will chase irrespective of any thing else ....they were two now ...and then on national highway which converted into narrow road by student gathering on road.

BUS APPEARED ,,,,,and his friend looked his glowing face ... and ..searching eyes ...in windows of that bus ....bus came near ...and made its way ....driver accelerated and race began .....they were paddling with full throttle .....and keeping up with bus ....running on their cycles beside bus ...both boy one after another ....he was keeping him self nearer to widows to find some one ...and eyes were getting off the road intermittently.....friend was riding ahead of him .....next 5 min they didn't know.....what will happen... and for him ..it was life of death ..because it was continuously seventh days he wasn't able to have a glance of her.....bus got decelerated and he was at front wheels..his was looking in cabin of bus for her.

SUDDENLY he was on road ......7 feet ahead of bus ,,,,in front of bus which was coming on road he didn't get anything but ..bus got brakes ...he got a glance ...of her .....was smiling irrespective of danger of death hovering on him ....his race was fruitful....he had tears in his eyes .....she knew him and was friend of him in early classes......it was time which separated them ..they got admission in different schools but she did not know about his ...ecstasy to see her ...urge for a glance of her ......she did not ..but when she looked on him on road ....she was horrified so were the other gals in cabin ..bus was approaching on him to squeeze him for ...........death .......she shouted ......all shouted in bus .......his friend shouted ,,,,,,it was his front wheel which got stuck in axle of rare wheel of his friend's cycle and cycle got power break effect on nearly 40kmph speed and it has thrown him on the road .....to HIS MOMENT ....under the shadow of death ......to have a glance ..of her ...driver applied brake ....wheel of bus were fighting with road and encroaching to get stopped ...but speed wasn't too low...to stop that early ....bus was still approaching on him to crush him ..but .....got stopped just .inches before him....driver was shouting ....." SALE MERI GADI KE NEECHE AAKE MAREGA KYA" ....she was looking in his eyes those were looking her with smile ...she was surprised ..on his smile ...his friend ran towards him to lift him ...but he was not ready to be lifted.........driver cam down and lifted him ...his friend carried away him ...forcefully ....looking towards his bruises ......she was smiling with tears .....and bus has gone.
As soon as bus started he was on his feet ...to chase it again ........